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Contra Advance: The Alien Wars Ex

GameBoy Advance - Konami - Action - E - 2 Players

What happens when you take the ManChild’s second favorite game on the Super Nintendo and mutilate it almost beyond recognition? Behold Contra Advance: The Alien Wars Ex.

Riding the hype generated by the announcement of the PS2's Shattered Soldier, The Alien Wars Ex is Konami’s attempt at bringing classic Contra home for a new generation of gamers (IE: Making money). Though the sheer volume of SNES ports in the GBA library is somewhat disturbing, I’ve never had a problem with them so long as they were done right. Contra Advance is not. Simply put, the Alien Wars Ex is the defacing of a classic.

Upon powering up your GBA and being greeted with the obligatory Konami and Nintendo logos, you are presented with the game’s mildly epileptic title screen. The only thing brought about by lingering at this screen is the risk for seizure and the subsequent foam that follows. Gone is the quasi Independence Day like cinema, and with it the rallying cry of ”Let’s attack aggressively”. Is it time for revenge? Have the Alien Wars begun? The world may never know. For those of you keeping score, that would be strike one.

Though a little miffed that I wasn’t going to witness an entire city being destroyed by an oversized alien face, I persevered and pressed start – if only to make the screen stop flashing for a bit. I am rewarded with a game that initially seems a lot like Contra III, albeit a watered down Contra III, visually and sonically speaking. The game’s orchestrated soundtrack just doesn’t sound right coming out of the GBA’s lone speaker; there isn’t nearly enough bass. Graphically, the game is a lot less detailed as a whole and the atmosphere suffers as a result. That’s not the worst of it, as the characters, enemies, and artillery are much too large for the GBA screen. The resulting effect is something that can only be described as having the characters look pasted onto the environments as opposed to living within them.

I was to find that the game was stripped down from a gameplay perspective as well. The original version of Alien Wars was quite possibly the best action title in all of 16-Bit gamedom. Alien Wars was a bigger, meaner type of Contra. The game was faster, the bosses were harder, and the explosions larger. In keeping with the ‘bigger is better’ mindset, the guys over at Konami saw fit to allow you to carry double the firepower. In Alien Wars Ex, the abilities to use smart bombs and to carry two weapons at a time (and not to mention the ability to strike suitably suave and cocky poses) have all been removed. It’s not so bad, as I’ve beaten the original in the past without utilizing either of these two features. It’s doable. But the game was designed with these abilities in mind, and fans of the original will miss them quite a bit. Some mangling of the controls due to the GBA’s button configuration is to be expected, but just deleting abilities like this is sloppy. Konami, that’s strike two.

But these flaws are made all the more bearable by the fact that Konami has interspersed this port with “Exclusive original levels for the GameBoy Advance.” Right? Well no, actually. Konami just ripped out the Mode 7 heavy overhead stages of the original and replaced them with two random levels from Contra Hard Corps. Exclusive and original they are not. False advertising - that would be strike three.

Truthfully, I couldn’t care less about the loss of the opening cinematic. The dip in graphics and sound quality was to be expected. Contra III is still entirely enjoyable with the loss of smart bombs and the ability to hold two weapons. And on the plus side of things, the gimmicky overhead levels of the original have been replaced with legitimate run and gun stages. Contra Advance does not sound that bad on paper. But something is missing. Whatever defined Contra III as what it was - though I can’t quite say what it is - is gone. I can’t find the problem, but as reviewer, the very least I can do is to let you know that it’s there. Avoid the Alien Wars Ex at all costs.

- Backgrounds tend to have an almost washed-out quality to them. - The mish mashing of Hard Corps levels between the prettier levels of the SNES game creates an awkward effect. - Sprites are too large for the GBA’s screen.	5.5
+ Excellent Alien Wars soundtrack remains unchanged... - Though it is marred by poor execution.	7.5
- Characters feel shoddy and weightless. - Stripped down from the original title. + Contra III is still in there... somewhere.	6.5
++ Some of the best enemy boss designs in all of gaming, past or present.	8.0
- Shoddy gameplay destroys any lasting appeal this title might have had.	4.0
-- Check the used bins at GameStop. Hit up eBay. Emulate if you have to. Contra Advance is not a suitable replacement for the original Contra III.	6.0
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